FROM CHAPTER XX:
swayamsu : girls r very confusing.i'm confused yet again
lalu : r u sure????
rahul : this z d most confusing question one could have ever asked at this moment to the most confusing guy i have ever seen......and i hav no confusion abt this.....how can confused person be sure nywayz????he he he..
lalu : shut up,i can't see nythng confusing abt that question....that z so simple and straight 4ward........as simple as swayamsu's girlfriend and as straight as professor MISHRA's straight -lines.....ha ha ha
swayamsu : another confusion in ur last sentence....my girlfrnd?????......i hav confusion over that.....i can't really understand d meaning of girlfriend......
rahul : ok,do u love her?????
swayamsu : yep
rahul : does c love u????
swayamsu : hmmm
lalu : then what d hell on earth has kept u confused????
swayamsu : i love her. c loves me. but we don't love each other.......
rahul : ohhh gaawwd....this z rarest of d rarest situations that can ever happen....REALLYY CONFUSING.....
1.STARTING A NEW LIFE.......
Each and every thing happens in our life for the first time....And we shd cherish all the memories and incidents that had happened with us at some phase of our life or the other and in some cases even changed our life....and being the first batch of a college affected my life in a grt way.....sometimes positively and sometimes negatively...
I still remember the speech of our DIRECTOR SIR on the orientation day: 'enjoy now and suffer later OR suffer now and enjoy later'-the choice z urs........the audience greeted the speech with a huge round of applause.....but SWAYAMSU SABYASACHI SAMAL was confused,he was thinking abt the 3rd option that the DIRECTOR didnt say....'enjoy nw and enjoy later'.......and it would have been the choice of all had it been in the option.....
Some beautiful,hot,sexy,ravishing,alluring girls.....as the boys rated each of the five,were selected for the NATIONAL ANTHEM at the end of the meeting.....the eyes of the boys' were wide open to have the first glimpse of the girls who r going 2 be wid them for d next 4 years.....may be some of them would be there for the whole life.......
But swayamsu was not impressed by these strikingly beautiful girls.....perhaps he had a different definition of beauty......perhaps he looked these girls from a different perspective than other boys......perhaps he didn't really look at them that well which could have forced him to praise their beauty........perhaps his eyes,mind,heart were different from others......perhaps he was CONFUSED.......
The orientation meeting was followed by the lunch session and then students divided into 4 sections,60 in each,were sent to different classrooms attend their first class of engineering life......
what is KVL- the question came from the blue no sooner than the students had settled their butts on the chair.....
I was expecting an introduction session and a question right from the beginning was out of my imagination.....quite a few students raised their hands and some of them answered the question and i was very much aware of my standard in the class.....this time no CONFUSION.....The 100 min class ended and hardly i had opened my mouth or my mind......though my eyes were open......nothing had enetered into my mind......thanx to the accent and teaching style of the faculty.......though most of the others were able to get that.....and it was a terrible beginning to my new life......my engineering life......
2. HELL OF A LIFE
My student life took yet another turn and I didn't know whether to be happy or to be sad.Life was full of bullshit as everything around me was new.....more precisely the subjects.I was not able to get any of the subjects and more frustrating than that was many students were doing much better than me.None of the subjects fascinated me...neither any of the teachers....classes were boring......may be only for me.
Sometimes we wonder why situations are like this,why we can't get away with it,but often we have no answer and we r left with only option to face it......
But things began to change and I started making friends.......friends for life.........anshuman,saina,lalu and rahul.Anshuman belonged to ECE branch and the other three from were from the same branch i was from- EEE.
In the first year the students from all the 4 branches were merged and divided into 4 section of 60 each.
Gradually I started to accept the change in my life and started to remain happy with my friends.Being a localite, I didn't have a very close friendship with most of the hostelites,though I knew most of them by face.We had a rented house in Bhubaneswar, the city in which the college was situated.
Sometimes life shocks.....but BPUT.....always!!!!To what we say exceptions in other cases,for BPUT it was genuine. Soon our first semester exam was on our head and the countdown had started.A semester of 6 months duration was completed in 3 and a half months.7 days before the exam the college was closed and I gave just 1 day to each paper for revision....sorry viosion in my case.I was not confident in any of the subjects .In the month of december it was quite cold there in BBSR and it was really difficult to study at night.....for the students who don't love their subjects.The chilling cold usually hardened my ass and made quite difficult to sit and study.
Finally the day of the exam arrived,undoubtedly the most atrocious day in anybody's college life.10am -1pm was our scheduled exam time.We were having MATHEMATICS on the first day.I started solving the questions and hardly solved any. Almost all the answers were incomplete.The exams went on one by one none of them went good,except 'C programming' ,which was average,courtesy to the question paper which was relatively easy.Anshuman,lalu,rahul and saina- everyone did well...atleast better than me.
It was around mid-february,evening 6 o'clock.The light of my cell beaped as it was in silent mode,without making any noise,flashing Anshuman on it.I received the call.'Results are out on the net'-he told me.'Did he just say that the results are our?'- ithought in my mind.'I got 8 sgpa.Tell me your registration number,i'll check ur result'-he told hysterically. '0802324228'-i replied he told me my result.'7.21 sgpa,'A' in one subject i.e. 'C programming', 'C' in 3 subjects and 'D' in other 2 subjects and thankfully no 'F' grades.Lalu got 8.11,rahul 7.93 and saina 7.76.This was probably my worst performance in any major exam till that day.My cell was switched off for the next few days and I was completely isolated from the outside world.Life had become hell......
3. love, life and friendship
Pipasa Punyatoya- the name was announced in the auditorium hall where the debate competition was being oraganized. She was beautiful......more than just beautiful. Perhaps GOD had given some extra effort to make this masterpiece. She wore no make-up.......yet her beauty was touching the pinnacle of charm. The radiant glow on her face made her look deamlike. My eyes were wide open adoring her spotless beauty........ and so was my mouth, when Rahul called me to bring me back from that trance.
But my eyes commanded more importance than my ears......I just couldn't take my eyes off her......she was surreal.'Swayamsu!! u there???'-Saina dabbed my shoulder and broke my wishful contemplation and I caught hold of mu lusty eyes and turned to Saina and then only i realized that the entire crew was watching me for last 2 minutes.....and the crew consisted of Anshuman,lalu,rahul and saina.
I faked a smile and tried to control my eyes from turning back and focus on them......but my heart was still adoring someone else's ravishing presence.'your eyes are glued on her from the very beginning....' Anshuman taunted.'she is beautiful no!!!'- I wanted their views.'so finally someone looked beautiful to your confusing eyes?'- saina replied.'No,I don't evaluate beauty through my eyes.Anything that gives pleasure to my heart is beautiful to me.For me beauty is not merely physical....it is beyond what you and others can see and perceive by looking at her.....'.Lalu interrupted me -'you bloody asshole......stop your philosophical speech.....how the hell you can see the internal beauty of that girl by seeing her for the first time.....without talking with her even once.....'.'Actually it requires certain amount of talent to know all these things and our ever confusing friend is one of those very few blessed talents....'-rahul told and all of them burst out laughing. But I didn't laugh.....may be I was in a different world......lost in her.. Soon she completed her speech and returned back to her place. Though we were in the same college for a whole semester I saw her for the first time.
I returned from the college and at the night I was trying to have a look on my ever ignored books. My patience was fighting a losing battle against the suffocating humidity of the room. I opened the window and let in some fresh air. But my ever boring course books couldn't keep me attracted for long time and I was lost in my thoughts.....sorry, in her thoughts.....that day.
I felt that i was in love, though I was confused about the definition of 'love'. For the first time I started believing that 'love happens at first sight', but in the very next moment I was confused that it was really love or not.
There was an acrimonious battle between my heart and my conscience. My heart told me that it was love, but my conscience told me that it was infatuation. My heart told me to carry on the relationship, but my conscience reminded me of my dignity.
Do these beautiful girls also have a beautiful heart??? Are these fair skinned girls are good enough to become a wife or a daughter-in-law??? And above all, do these so called smart girls can be believed to have a long term relationship selflessly.......or do they really know the meaning of true love????
I couldn't find the answers to the above questions and finally my conscience won the battle. I decided to start a new life from the next day.
I was happy because I reached to a conclusion......I was sad because my love story met with an abrupt ending.........and I was confused because I was both happy and sad......
I was a 5'8'' boy with a rather undistinguished looks, born to handsome parents. I had a terribly mediocre academic record throughout my school and college carrier. So it was unlikely for a girl to love me for my looks....or for my studies.....nor did I have a thick wallet.
Our college was organizing its first ever annual function. I was doing a skit along with some of my friends and it was a hit.....probably the best part of the function..... courtesy:student ranking. I received considerable accolades from the whole college.
It had been only one day since the annual function.
'Is Pipasa your friend- yes no' -my orkut homepage flashed.
I clicked 'yes'.....and she was again back into my life....
'hi:' i saw her scrap in my scrapbook and I also dropped a 'hiii'
'r u online'- she hurriedly replied
'no..i m nt online......lol' was my prompt reply.
she liked my sense of humour
'lol....by the way your skit was very interesting.....we thoroughly enjoyed it'
'thanx 4 the complement.......'
'ok...I got to go now.....hv a lot of work to do....bye.......'she told and went offline.
But she was right inside my heart.
